Friday, April 19, 2013

Clarification on the Rant

I have cooled down since yesterday's post. It was written in frustration and crankiness. However, the thoughts posted truly are what I feel.

I wanted to clarify on the spanking issue. It truly is a sticky topic.

* Disciplining out of Anger
Unfortunately, most people do discipline out of anger. I don't remember that being the case with my mom disciplining me. I remember being in my room for a little while before getting a spanking on a couple occasions. I don't remember my mom, who was the main disciplinarian in the house, ever lashing out in least not with spanking. Arguing is a horse of a different color all together as we fought like cats and dogs when I hit my teens!

And it's not about just leaving it done once punishment has been served. I remember many times after the spanking sitting in my room, crying/wimpering from my sore bootay. My mom would come in and we would talk about why I got a spanking. How what I had done wasn't acceptable behavior. Then she would tell me she loved me and we would go watch TV together, or play Barbies, or whatever. There was never discipline without the reinforcement of the parent's love.

* Other forms of punishment
As I got older, and more padding on my bootay, spanking wasn't effective. So I would get grounded or privileges taken away. Some parents find this more effective than spanking. And that is fantastic. I'm hoping that will be the case in my house as well!

* My Opinion
That's all these posts are. My opinion and how I feel about things. I hope you didn't think I was telling people that they should start spanking. I'm sorry if that was implied as it wasn't meant to be. I believe it is the parents choice how they want to discipline their children and I don't mean to tell anyone how to do their "job". I think my mindset was more from the stand point of (and not at anyone in specific) "what you're doing isn't working, it's time to try a different strategy." Have you seen the Ikea commercial where the mom puts the boy in time out in the kitchen and he proceeds to tear the place apart when she walks out? That's what I'm talking about. That is obviously not working as a disciplinary tool for him. It's time to find something else. Take a favorite toy away. Try a different place for time out - one where he doesn't have all the things to get into...maybe nose to a corner or something. I'm not saying you HAVE to spank your child. I'm just saying that is what my husband and I agree on as a last resort. I am, however, trying to point out that maybe you need to rethink your game plan.

All in all, if what you are doing is working, then that is GREAT!! It's up to you how you want to do things in your house with your family. This is just my place to rant/vent/discuss what's running though my morning brain!

Happy Friday!!  :)

No comments:

Post a Comment